So Long Summer

It was fun while it lasted and it was nice to know you.

My "real JOB" as a Speech Therapist has begun AGAIN (riiiiight... your jaw just dropped that I am not technically a "professional blogger"cause I am THAT good). Naw yo, full time, 8 plus hour workdays at a school, fixing lisps and r's (common misconception, this is not at ALL what I do) is where it's at for me.

Sooo without further ado, my "ODE" to a summer well spent.

The "Late Show with David Letterman" has the top
ten, "10 Things I hate about you" and "How to loose a guy in 10 days" (don't pretend you're too good for these classics) put emphasis on the number 10. Which is why I have chosen to highlight my summer in a top 10 fashion (in random order. I promise #1 was not more fun or cooler than #7).

Why should you care you ask? I don't know, why anyone reads this blog is beYOND me, but nonetheless, I KNOW you're out there.

10. Running the Rock and Roll Marathon SAN DI-AGO because C-Note made me. I thanked her later. Although I think she may have lost a little respect for me due to crying and pleading at mile 23, while gasping for air and hyper-ventilating.

(obviously I wanted to catch your attention, ahh SHIZZZ....., get ready for the rest....... )

9. Getting locked out of my own house for 3 hours, shoe less and in a revealing, let's say "loose" top with no bra(let your imagination run wild), hang-in with the neighbies. "Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got, cuz I'm still W-T from the block".

8. Enjoying the mornings, paying close attention to the beautiful sunrises and chirping birds. MMMM-K, this did NOT happen, despite multiple attempts and the best intentions. Heh, a girlz gotta catch up on some z's.

7. Spying on neighbors daily activities....this is not as pathetic as it sounds, I was TOTALLY busy and way too good for this, just checking to make sure you're still there.

6. Endless hours at Barnes and Noble, fingering through magazines so that making sure not to spend a DIME. Does it sound like I had too much time on my hands?

5. TODAY show in the morning (minus Meridith Vierra's stupid, inappropriate jokes, face and awkward laugh. She's SO lame). I hate to even mention the extra 4th hour with Hoda Kofi and Kathy Lee, GAG. Are the executives kidding?!

4. Almost dying while tubing the Salt River....there ARE rapids! I had a new found sense of life's delicate balance.

3. CO-ED soccer in 110 plus degree heat, while going up against a MAN WOMAN beast named Sabina (seriously her name, doesn't it sound like a lioness?), the jury is still out on that one.
P.S. still getting over groin injury...1 month later and continuing to ponder mysterious opponents sex.

2. ALMOST buying a $30.oo Eames swivel chair at Goodwill, but not, do to previous agreement with THE significant other, only to go back on 1/2 off Saturday ('cause $15 sounds so much better than $30) to find it was GONE! Did I mention that they go for $35oo? Yahhh, that day I almost gave up, but then quickly realized, life's not about possessions (barf). This one deserves an entire dedicated blog entry to be determined at a later date. Stay tuned.

Drum roll please

1. Taking care of one deathly ill Husband. OK, so I may have a slight problem with worrying, I thought he was going to die.......Between the night sweats and uncontrollable shivers, thoughts of incurable diseases and rare illnesses swarmed my every thought. Some day some one will thank me for thinking of the random 1 in a millionth disease that I discover from their symptoms. These occasions put life into perspective (and it sure helped that it happened after the EAMES chair incident, I finally let it go).

Did you notice how I turned so many negatives into positives? Kudos to Luise L. Hay, author of the self help book of the NOW . Also a summer pastime, but not noteworthy enough to make the top ten.

SIDE NOTE: I use way to many of these " " and these (blah blah blah blah).

I like 'em hard....ahh errr (double wink)

Soo....I was at AJ's Fine Foods the other morning looking to take advantage of their delicious bakery concoctions. First, with the best intentions I headed over to the fruit section and picked out THE perfect banana. I figured if I was going to fill my body with delicious, sweet empty calories, I might as well have a lil healthy potassium to go with it. Then, I made my way over to the bakery counter. Oooh, ahhh!! All the buttery croissants, turnovers, Cinnamon rolls and donuts a sugar craving girl could ask for. "Can I help you" the fine gentleman behind the counter asked, "Ummm, ahh, err, I don't know want I want yet"....I responded. After scouring up and down the rows of delicacies in the glass case, I spotted my indulgence for the morning. "Umm" I said, "I'll have the nut roll. "Awkward" I thought to myself. I could have said "the roll with Carmel and nuts or, "The Cinnamon nut roll" but no, I chose the classy mantastic one word syllable. I placed my accompanying banana on the counter to also be rung up. "Are you sure you want the green one" he asked, "it's not going to be very ripe yet for eating. "Oh, yah, I know" I responded "I like em hard, otherwise their too mushy and soft, ahhhhh yaah (voice trails off)". Nice! I wanted to reverse word vomit. Who says stuff like that "One large nut roll, with a side of hard banana, cause that's how I like 'em"? He probably thought I was one of those undercover secret sex world chicks talking "code" for "I want your junk".


Chiquita! Ba da dum dum chink.

Re-bonjour Project Runway

Epi 1:
Designers construct outfits from crazy materials (i.e. plastic cups, coffee filters, lettuce, tablecloths, etc.). To watch these designers construct wearable ART out of everyday usable items, was inspiring. I felt like rummaging through drawers and garage storage boxes to "redeem" thrown out items for new use.


My favorite, top is coffee filters with holes burned for a pattern and....bottom is dyed vacuum bags and.....the back is hook and eye closures from a notebook spiral, what?!

Dress constructed with CANDY, how SWEET. Although not the most innovative or pulled off (the designer kind of copped out at last minute).
Her top is made from BALLS.....you know the kind you can kick and they bounce forever. Bottom is lawn chair fabric, how durable, heh.

I have a ton of paper clips just lying around.....perhaps a skirt is in store.

Having to be creative with limited materials is always way more interesting than having an infinite amount of choices at your fingertips. Design can be so stuffy and snobby. This proves it's not about who it came from or the extravagant amount, but thinking outside the box and having a vision (can you tell which side of the tracks I'm from).

Carpe Diem!

EL TORRO BRAVO

A bull shirt with horns and stripes scored for the HUZ-BAND at a whopping .99 cents from a local, shall I say cost friendly store. Who would have thought that this would be my huz's new equivalent to a "Mister T" shirt at say age 6, that got the little fuzzy balls and faded logo from too much washing and wearing. You know, we all had that article of clothing, blanket and/or stuffed animal (mine was a strawberry shortcake skirt with frilly lace that was degraded to a rag).

First some background: If I ever have any kind of inkling of buying clothing for the huz, it has to be cheap and NON BRAND (AKA, Target, Mexico's street market and my personal favorite Walgreens... specifically shirts with themes such as the quintessential dancing kachina and the timeless purple mountain with the howling desert coyote in the forefront. It's easy to get carried away).

This is the guy that expressed excessive, unrelenting refusal and would not even TRY ON a pair of Abercrombie jeans that I bought him (back in the day, you know, when there was a song about it), which now I can appreciate as I have since moved on from the lacrosse/cricket/tea enjoying "scene". He'd be perfectly fine wearing stretchy sweat pants and tapered white wash jeans (which he was famous for in high school).

Well, I knew "I had him from hello" when I came home that day with the see through plastic bags full to the brim, it's contents exposed. The "gently used" shirt treasures ranged from a Miami Vice Esq see through pastel pink button up with turquoise and lavender stripes (think day at the beach, chest hair exposed), blue paisley pattern (a little femme, I'll admit),to his personal FAVE, El BRAVO(can't blame him, have you seen the intricate stitching). Who knows if it's because the tag says Roper, in his words "A real cowboy brand" or his dreamy thoughts of the handle bar mustache, boot and spur stomping, ass hugging wrangler wearing of a rustic Ranch Man who used to own it. What can I say, whether it is because of the previous owner or original grass roots, as long as he keeps sportin it (it's been a week and he has worn it 5 out of 7 days), I'll support whatever fantasy he conjures up.
OLE!

DAZLIOUS

white, delicate, lace, fall slow
whirl, fleet, up and down, finally down
land, soft, fury of white
Perfect

A movie review (by yours truly):

The human condition is put under a microscope and illuminated in the movie "SNOWCAKE".

My Take: The feeling of connection and sameness may be difficult to gain in a world where to most you are just another speck amongst an infinite amount. But to a few, the ones that matter...Dazlious.

A snowflake saunters to the ground from the sky with the vast number of mute white, unknown territory until it joins the army of others on the blanket of ground, uniquely different yet all the same.

This movie "takes the cake" on so many levels, that I would not do it justice in summary. Here, enjoy a slice or two (wink):

(Playing Comic Book Scrabble)
Linda: "B-A-A-N-G". Alex: "You can't have two A's in bang. Linda: "In Comic Book Word Scrabble, you can. You can have three A's if you want".

(On Alex's appearance)
Linda: "Do people like you Alex"? Alex: "Not much, no". Linda: "I'm not surprised. It's because those glasses don't look right on your face, you have a long face and those glasses make you look shifty".

(From Linda, who happens to have Autism)
"Neurotypical people are obsessed with having friends. I'm only trying to help you get some".

See it. It is Perfectamundo!